No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.
Lactomangulation, n.: Manhandling the “open here” spout on a milk carton so badly that one has to resort to using the “illegal” side.
It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.
Thank God kids never mean well
A child is a curly, dimpled lunatic.
All children are essentially criminal.
My wife and I tried to breakfast together, but we had to stop or our marriage would have been wrecked.
It is one of the superstitions of the human mind to have imagined that virginity could be a virtue.