When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other.
The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television.
I married beneath me – all women do.
Never chase a lie. Let it alone, and it will run itself to death.
Nice guys finish last, but we get to sleep in.
Sleep is an eight-hour peep show of infantile erotica.
Decency…must be an even more exhausting state to maintain than its opposite. Those who succeed seem to need a stupefying amount of sleep.
I have to think hard to name an interesting man who does not drink.